Some More Nasruddin Quickies

Here are some more little ones, under 50 words:

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"My donkey's a genius!" Nasruddin shouted to his wife, who just looked at him skeptically.
"I'll show you! Donkey, what is 3 times 7 plus 5 minus 6 divided by 4 times 2 minus 10? There! Did you see?"
"But he didn't do anything."
"Exactly! The answer is nothing!"

I had fun making up the math problem that Nasruddin proposes to the donkey; when I was little, I loved math games like this that would. yield zero or else would lead back to the same number a person had guessed originally... mathematics magic!

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Poor Nasruddin: his donkey didn't have any hat to eat... so he sold his donkey to buy some hay.

At least this is a better outcome for the donkey than the story where Nasruddin teaches his donkey to go without food... except that the donkey up and dies before he has finished learning the lesson! 

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Nasruddin bought a huge bag of bird seed at the market.
"How many birds do you have?" the salesman asked.
"None!" replied Nasruddin. "But I'm hoping to grow a whole flock."

No, you cannot grow birds from bird seed... and you cannot get a horse from an egg either; see the story of the horse's egg.

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"Where are you going?" asked Nasruddin's wife.
"It's the mayor's uncle's funeral," replied Nasruddin.
"The mayor's uncle?" But you don't even know him!"
"That doesn't matter! I always go to other people's funerals," Nasruddin replied, "so they will come to mine!"

In a variant on this one, Nasruddin refuses to go to someone's funeral, saying, "It's not as if he is going to come to mine!" 

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"Nasruddin, what happened? Why is your leg in a cast?"

"I broke it!"

"But how?"

"Raking leaves."

"But I don't understand..."

"It was a very tall tree!"

Moral of the story: don't rake your leaves before they're fallen. 

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One day little Nasruddin climbed all the way up to the highest shelf in the kitchen... and then he knocked down his mother's favorite bowl.

It shattered.

"It's okay, mama!" Nasruddin shouted. "I'm not hurt!"

Little Nasruddin's response might seem foolish, because his mother is probably not going to think it is okay that her favorite bowl is broken. But I think there is some foolish wisdom at work here: if she stops and thinks about it, little Nasruddin is right. A shattered bowl can be replaced, but not a shattered little boy... and Nasruddin can grasp his lucky escape more quickly than his mother might.

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When Nasruddin learned that most car accidents happen with two miles of home, he moved.

And yes, if you are wondering, there are indeed modern Nasruddin jokes that involve cars, airplanes, etc., in addition to the traditional Nasruddin jokes where his donkey is his means of transportation. 

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The policeman pulled Nasruddin over for speeding. "You were doing over 100 miles an hour," he said.
"Impossible!" replied Nasruddin. "I only left my house about ten minutes ago."

This is another fun one with Nasruddin and mathematics. Yes, we believe in the concept of an "average" ... but who knows just how far Nasruddin would have driven in a whole hour? Maybe over 100 miles, or maybe not. Of course, he is still going to get a speeding ticket!

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Nasruddin was sitting beside the river.

"I need to across," a stranger said. "How deep is it?"

"Two inches," Nasruddin replied. "Maybe three."

The man walked into the river, and its deep, rushing currents swept him away.

"How strange," thought Nasruddin. "The water only came half-way up on the ducks."

This is one of those jokes where you have to wonder if Nasruddin is really the fool that he seems to be, or perhaps a much more dangerous character: the trickster. 

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"Nasruddin, you stole apricots from my orchard!"

"No, I didn't!" Nasruddin insisted.

"But I can produce six witnesses who saw you stealing the apricots."

"So what? I can produce a hundred witnesses who didn't see me."

I can easily imagine Nasruddin bringing all one hundred witness to court to provide their eyewitness testimony that they did not see him stealing apricots!

apricots